Monday, May 15, 2006
Mother's Day...Let me share my day with you.....
So, I woke up yesterday morning. Now, I had already told my children on Saturday night that Sunday was Mother's Day, so they had to obey and be perfect. They were fine with that-they understood what I said, there was no confusion. Now, I wake up (my husband is at work for the 14th day in a row-camp season has started) to get myself and the kids ready for church. Shane was planning to come home at 9:15am, just in time to go to church. Things started out normal-I hopped in the shower, the kids dressed themselves. All was going well...then my daughters started fighting, just picking at each other, really. Until my youngest kicked the oldest and my oldest told my youngest that she hated her. Now, I do not know where they get this from. They have never been taught this way. I suppose it just goes to prove that they were NOT born good, like so many say. No, they have to be taught to be good-being naughty comes very naturally!!
I stop blow drying my hair to deal with them. One received her punishment with no argument, the other fought me-but you'll be glad to know that I won! We hug, we pray, and I continue to try to get ready. As I am blow drying my hair, I look in the mirror. What has happened to that cute, 19 year old I once was? Some women get pregnant and look like they are carrying basketballs. I look like I am carry basketballs, too-just a few of them, and in many places besides my stomach. Now, I know this is my pride-not my insecurities, as my husband would tell me. Okay, so my pride got ahold of me as I was getting ready for church. Then, the girls start fussing at each other again. This all goes on and on and on. By the time Shane gets home, I am crying my eyes out. Poor man has seen too much of that lately. I suppose 50% or more is hormones. He holds me and prays with me, as he is so good to do. He assures me that I'm beautiful, and ushers the kids into the car. Once in the car, he tells the girls that he will have no more of their fighting as they have already given mom a nervous breakdown before church! And, off to church we go....
At church, there's the usual "how are you?" To which I replied mostly, "How are YOU?" with a smile! Of course, some saw through that, but I promised myself I wouldn't cry at church, since I cried last week at church when people asked how I was! I saved my crying for after church, when we were in the packed out restaurant.
As I couldn't decide what sounded good to eat, Shane took charge and chose Carraba's. Great italian restaurant, it was our first time there. We are seated quickly, which was nice because it was packed. We are on a budget, so looking at the menu did little to relieve my stress. The girls split a dinner, and I chose something on the less-expensive side. My husband-who is an avid carnivore-can't help himself but to go for the $17 steak. It was nothing really, but I had to excuse myself to the ladies' room. I sat in the nice stall, and cried and cried. Why? More or less the last six months of being tired, the last two weeks of having him home less than normal, and some of it the $17 steak! And, I cried some more! I wiped my eyes, went to the table trying for him not to notice my puffy, red eyes. He said, "you've been crying, haven't you?" And, I started crying again!
After I got it out of my system, I suppose I was feeling a bit better. I enjoyed my manicotti and salad, and we even laughed some at our silly girls. Shane went to Starbucks, and then took us to Coldstone Creamery. Now, I quite quickly forgot the budget we were on and ordered a peanut butter cup chocolate concoction of ice cream in a chocolate dipped waffle bowl...then the crying was miraculously over. As a matter of fact, Shane said he should have taken me there first, because I couldn't stop smiling. I ate about 1/4 of it and couldn't eat anymore!
I'm happy to say the rest of the day was nice. I got to take a nap, spend time with my family, and be assured over and over that I am loved. It's nice to be loved when you don't feel lovely, when all you want to do is cry and sleep. It's great to be part of a family who doesn't think you're crazy even when you think you just might be! I love my little family God has given me. I love being a mom, even on the rough days. And, I'm so thankful for a husband who will just hold me and kiss my forehead as much as it takes to reassure me I am his and I can be at rest there. He's a good example of God to me. I am truly blessed. Kari