Weight Loss

Okay, so I'm not going to be linking this post up on facebook for the world to see, but I will share with you, my few readers! :) I've debated whether to do this or not, but it will be good accountability for me. Ugh..my struggle with weight loss! It has been a struggle for me for my whole adult life, basically. Well, back when I was..not thin, but just about right for me..I didn't know it, but since the babies came, it's been a roller coaster for me.

The past few years, I've tried this and that. I tried adding more coconut oil to my diet, which plumped me up more! I tried eating only whole foods, which did the same! I knew enough by then, from reading alot, that I didn't want to do low-fat, sugar free diets anymore. But, I just haven't been able to hold myself accountable, I suppose. (though I hate to admit it)

I have joined Weight Watchers 3 times in the past. (I should be put in "the box of shame", for those of you who saw Despicable Me!) First time I lost 23 pounds, second time ?, third time about 12 or so. Every time I thought I was smart enough to go home and do it on my own. Guess not! The past few years, I've avoided joining again..one, because I was still sure I could do it on my own, two-because I wasn't looking forward to nights of hunger. :) Plus, I always lost weight on eating 100 calorie twinkies and york peppermint patties and diet soda. But, I can't say I felt better physically, health-wise. That was my own fault, but it was what it was nonetheless.

Anyhow, whenever Shane saw me struggling with one plan or another, he'd say "you know honey, the only thing that's ever worked for you is Weight Watchers." After two years, I decided I was out of other options. :) So, Merry Christmas to me, I joined WW online. (because it's cheaper) This time, however, I have been determined to do it eating regular foods (focusing on whole foods as much as I can..or want to). I am determined not to eat low-calorie, nutrient lacking foods, just eat less of what I normally cook or ingest. Anyhow, the whole WW program has been re-vamped anyhow, and it's alot easier now to do for some reason. (I think the fact that fruits are free helps me alot!) I don't feel deprived at night anymore. (maybe b/c I'm making better choices with more satiating foods..and being gluten free knocks out my "100 calorie twinkie options anyhow!) :)

So, I invite you to join me on my journey or help me (push me) along the way. :) I joined a few weeks before Christmas, lost 1.8 lbs, then gained it back over Christmas/New Years! Tomorrow is my weigh in for this week. I have hope I have lost something. WW wants me to lose 40 pounds. Ugh. That number just kills me and feels so far off, it almost seems impossible. Let's just say, I haven't weighed that number since I was 20! But, I know I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I feel okay, not great, but okay with where I am right now. (usually) I realize now that I will not be a super model when this is all over. I still may not like my thighs or hind end or feel "skinny." However, I want to be healthy for my family, and stop this before it gets farther than it's already gone.

Okay, that's my story. I amost don't even want to post this. But, what do I have to hide? So, here I am laid bare (well, you know what I mean). There's a new weight loss ticker at the bottom of my page. I'll try to keep it updated and keep you all updated. Appreciate your prayers. I know some of you share this struggle, some of you don't (I still love you). But, I think this will be good accountability for me.